Inexpensive, yet surprisingly powerful laser pointing devices have
become ubiquitous in America. Millions of people own such a
device. Laser light stays coherent over vast distances, the
beams spreading very little. In theory, even a single laser
pointer could reach KROQ. The idea behind Paint
the ROQ is to organize a dozen
or so people Burbank to try and shine their laser pointers on one
area of KROQ at one time, to see if we can create a temporary visible
field of color on the DJ.
Will it work?
I honestly don't know. I'm a smartass, not a scientist.
But I think it could work, in theory. If we can get a few dozen
people to attempt it, it just might work. We very well may not
succeed. But wouldn't it be great if we did? Think how
truly awesome a sight it would be, and the feeling you'd have in knowing
that you helped to make it possible. The more people who join
in, the better our chances are. So, help spread the word: tell
everyone you know about this site. Tell the press. Tell
your congressional representative. Hey, tell your dog!
Well, no, dogs can't see color. And when dogs talk to you, you
are insane. Forget that. But tell everyone else.
And actually, I'm not the first crazy to want to shoot lasers at the
station. Rick Dees has been dreaming of it for over 12 years, as part
of a wacky morning show gag gone horribly wrong.
And if there are people out there who want to produce buttons, bumper-stickers,
or whatnot for sale at conventions or over the net, feel free.
Just do two things: have this website on there, and send me one of
whatever you're making. You want a product endorsement, email
Why do it?
So-called 'environmental artists' such as Christo have explored large
scale, temporary works that involve altering or enhancing the landscape
with fabric and other materials. This is along the same lines:
to create a temporary dance of red laser light on the windows of the
building which would be visible from the corner of Olive & Riverside.
But just as important as accomplishing this goal is the cooperative
effort involved. For it to have even the slightest a chance
of working, dozens of people will have to take a few minutes out of
an autumn night to join together and do one thing. hundreds
more will be able to participate by watching the show. For five
minutes, we can all be focused on sharing this collaborative work
of art. We can all touch the Stryker (or Doug the Slug, or whoever
is on) , if only with our laser pointers.
On October 23th at 11:57 P.M. EDT (10:57 P.M. CDT, 9:57 P.M. MDT,
8:57 P.M. PDT) and again on November 20th at 12:13 A.M. EST (11:13
P.M. CST, 10:13 P.M. MST, 9:13 P.M. PST), everyone who has a laser
pointer, flashlight, spotlight, or jar of lightning bugs and a clear
view of the first-quarter Moon should turn on their pointers and aim
them at the 9th floor of the Union Bank Building. The illustration
at the top of this page will not assist you in any way. Continue
to shine your pointer at this spot for five minutes. That's
it. Big Boy combos at Bob's when we're done.
These dates and times were selected for a couple of reasons, but I
must keep them secret for now. Just know this: the fate of the free
world may depend on this.
Why two attempts? Because it might rain or something.
If large sections of Burbank have weather problems, we'll see about
scheduling another attempt in the spring.
So . . .
Make sure the batteries for your laser pointer are fresh, tell your
friends about this website, and hope for clear weather. Let's
see if we can Paint the ROQ!
"The best you can
is good enough." -Radiohead