Category: Photoshop

  • Walk of Fame Movies: Jewel Robbery and Helen Vinson

    Kay Francis and William Powell in Jewel Robbery.
    William Powell and Kay Francis in Jewel Robbery.

    Some clues that this is a pre-Code film:

    • The first scene is two scantily clad women talking about cheating on their husbands.
    • Two men are openly pursuing one of the married women.
    • One of the men is a charming jewel thief, and the woman is into it big time.
    • The thief casually hands out weed, and it gets smoked.
    • All law enforcement is either inept or corrupt

    …and of course the thief gets away.

    Composite picture. On the left, a mockup of Helen Vinson's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. On the right, a black and white portrait photo of Helen Vinson.

    This was Helen Vinson’s first movie role. She acted for a dozen or so years before retiring. Her star is at 1560 Vine Street.

    Today’s poster is based on a very similar film about police corruption.

    A fake poster for Jewel Robbery mimicking the poster for Serpico.
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  • Movie Pass Adventures: Good Fortune

    Aziz Ansari and Keanu Reeves in Good Fortune.
    Keanu Reeves in Good Fortune.

    I wonder if I would have liked Aziz Ansari’s first attempt at directing more than this, but Bill Murray creepiness apparently killed that project. This is pretty mediocre, but Keanu is perfectly cast as a dim-witted angel.

    Today’s poster is also mediocre, but I thing the logos for the movie and Lionsgate-as-Nickelodeon work.

    A fake poster for Good Fortune poorly mimicking the poster for Good Burger.

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  • Walk of Fame movies: You’d Be Surprised and Earle Williams

    Dorothy Sebastian and Raymond Griffith in You'd Be Surprised.
    Dorothy Sebastian and Raymond Griffith in You'd Be Surprised.

    I wonder if this was originally written as a play. Almost every scene is shot in the same room from the same angle. It’s supposed to be a murder mystery, but that’s really just an excuse for Raymond Griffith to do his shtick.

    Composite picture. On the left, a mockup of Earle Williams's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. On the right, a black and white portrait photo of Earle Williams.

    Eleven years before this movie, Earle Williams (1560 Vine Street) was voted America’s number one star. A year after it was released, he was dead from pneumonia.

    Today’s fake poster is my second James Bond ripoff homage.

    A fake poster for You'd Be Surprised mimicking the poster for You Only Live Twice.
    Hey, a coroner is like a spy, right?

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  • Walk of Fame Movies: Unfaithfully Yours and Kurt Kreuger

    Linda Darnell and Rex Harrison in Unfaithfully Yours.
    Linda Darnell, Kurt Kreuger, and Rex Harrison in Unfaithfully Yours.

    Okay, I’ll admit it: sometimes I’m dumb. The whole idea of this movie is that Rex Harrison has fantasies about dealing with his possibly cheating wife, but I didn’t realize they were fantasies until the first one ended. This is even though the camera literally zooms right up to Harrison’s face and into his eye before each vignette.

    This movie is a lot of fun if you disregard the sudden turn from the most devoted husband ever to would-be murderer and back over the course of a few hours.

    Composite picture. On the left, a mockup of Kurt Kreuger's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. On the right, a black and white portrait photo of Kurt Kreuger.

    Kurt Kreuger (1560 Vine Street) plays Harrison’s assistant. This is a change from a lot of the roles Kreuger was getting. He was just the right look and age to get cast as a bunch of Nazis, and he wasn’t thrilled about it.

    Today’s poster reminds us that what’s mine is yours, and what’s enemy is unfaithfully.

    A fake poster for Unfaithfully Yours mimicking the poster for Enemy Mine.
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  • Movie Pass Adventures: Predator: Badlands

    Elle Fanning and Dek from Predator: Badlands.
    Dek the Predator's yes from Predator: Badlands

    If you want to make a PG-13 movie but still have tons of blood and dismemberment, make everyone an android or an alien, and make sure their blood is anything other than red. Then it’s just fun!

    Today’s fake poster was an obvious choice.

    A fake poster for Predator Badlands mimicking the poster for Badlands.

  • Movie Pass Adventures: The Running Man

    Glen Powell in The Running Man.
    Glen Powell in The Running Man.

    It’s fun. The ending is silly, but they sure couldn’t do the book ending these days. Michael Cera is the best part of the movie.

    Today’s fake poster is based on a film about a different man.

    A fake poster for The Running Man mimicking the poster for The Elephant Man.
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  • Walk of Fame Movies: Meet John Doe, Rod La Rocque, and a progress update

    Gary Cooper and Barbara Stanwyck in Meet John Doe.
    Gary Cooper and Barbara Stanwyck embrace while a group of men watch in Meet John Doe.

    A movie made by a very conservative director starring two very conservative actors that says you can’t trust the rich and you can’t stop ordinary people from doing good. I wonder how they’d feel about today’s political climate?

    Composite picture. On the left, a mockup of Rod La Rocque's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. On the right, a black and white portrait photo of Rod La Rocque.

    Rod La Rocque (1580 Vine Street) plays Ted Sheldon, the nephew of the richest man in the movie, and the closest thing Gary Cooper has to a romantic rival. In real life he had been a popular silent film star ho transitioned into character roles in talkies, then retired in his fifties. His marriage to fellow silent film star Vilma Banky (who I recently saw in Son of the Sheik) was huge, and they stayed together until his death in 1977.

    Today’s fake poster is another “Meet [name of person]” movie, but I doubt anyone will recognize it.

    A fake poster for Meet John Doe mimicking the poster for Meet Wally Sparks.

    Walk of Fame Progress Report

    A map of my progress seeing movies for every motion picture star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. The entire walk (Hollywood Blvd from Gower to La Brea, Vine St from Franklin to Sunset) is highlighted. most of it is yellow, but the south side of Hollywood from Gower to Vine and the east side of Vine from Hollywood to just south of Selma is red.

    Depending on how you look at it, I’m either very far along or just getting started. There are 1227 motion picture stars. If you look at contiguous stars, I’ve only completed 142, or about 11.5%. That’s the part in red. But if you don’t worry about them touching, I’ve seen 876, about 71%. And a lot of these old movies cover more than one star, so it should only go faster as I see more stuff. That’s good, because at the rate I’m going this thing is going to take me four years!

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  • Walk of Fame Movies: Hell’s Highway and Richard Dix

    Richard Dix in Hell's Highway (1932).
    Stabnley Fiields, Richard Dix, and Tom Brown in Hell's Highway.

    Whoever designed the original poster for this sure had fun adding not-very subtle subtext:

    The original poster for Hell's Highway (1932)
    Nothing to see here. Just a man named Richard Dix, in chains, turned away from the viewer, with “Hell’s Highway” written across his butt.
    Composite picture. On the left, a mockup of Richard Dix's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. On the right, a black and white portrait photo of Richard Dix.

    Richard Dix (1608 Vine Street) is Duke, a bank robber on a brutal chain gang. He plans an escape, but when Johnny, his brother, gets put in the same gang, Duke decides to stay in to protect him. He doesn’t do a great job.

    Today’s fake poster is a David Lynch ripoff:

    A fake poster for Hell's Highway mimicking the poster for Lost Highway.
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  • Movie Pass Adventures: Roofman

    Channing Tatum in Roofman.
    Channing Tatum and Kirsten Dunst in Roofman.

    When I see the title “Roofman” my brain starts playing a parody of Soundgarden’s “Spoon Man.”

    Straightforward, fun movie.

    And I’m pretty happy with today’s fake poster.

    A fake poster for Roofman mimicking the poster for The Wolfman.
  • Movie Pass Adventures: Die My Love

    A Negative image of Jennifer Lawrence rendered in reds and yellows on a light blue and gray background.
    Jennifer Lawrence and Robert Pattison in Die My Love

    Jennifer Lawrence is really good at finding projects that give her new ways to be miserable. She’s also really good at playing those parts, so it all works out.

    Good Golly, it’s a fake poster!

    A fake poster for Die My Love mimicking the poster for East of Eden.
    Whoever made the original version of this sure likes breaking design rules!
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